LIFE JOURNAL

Saturday, October 16, 2010

please vote for them, my friends. just 'like' the photo, but before that, add the account 'Rapid Medan' first. thank you. :D

http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=1662863056087&set=a.1657085951663.90497.1372551834

Labels: about her

2:47 PM

Sunday, September 26, 2010

I exclusively wish Stephanie Candra a very happy birthday!
may all good wishes come true and existing things grow better and better.

HAPPY 16TH BIRTHDAY MY DEAR. <3
I love you.

Labels: about her, event

9:14 AM

Tuesday, August 24, 2010

hello mr. worry-head, do you know that you have over-worried about something too much?

yes, i'm talking to myself.

and yes, i do worry too much.

you see, she and i haven't had a proper contact recently because both of us have been so busy.

i got tons of works to be done from college, and she's having her school exam.

and yes i tell you, i DO worry.

unreasonable worries actually, because just like i told you, i got tons of works to be done from college, and she's having her school exam.

do i say it right?

i got tons of works to be done from college, and she's having her school exam.

and hell yeah!

I've known the reason why we haven't had a proper contact, it's so obvious, isn't it?

but i just can't stop worrying, i don't know why.

maybe it's just because i feel so lonely. :(

i always stop worrying just when i got her message. it's like i'm relieved just by having news from her.

we also haven't had any calls. ohh just how much i miss her voice, her jokes (well, she doesn't share jokes actually, but i always find everything she says funny. :D), her laughter (this is the best), her stories, and her being so kind to me.

now that i miss you more and more. :(

guess i'm off.

see you on Christmas.

Labels: about her

10:38 PM

Wednesday, August 18, 2010

hey!

think that i blogged much recently. :D

since when, eh?

ahh. since i started falling for her i guess. *grin*

she's just so perfect that i can't stop admiring her. *big smile*

but eh, i got some story to tell you.

*curhat*

lol.

you know, since i published my relationship with her on facebook, it has been so many GUYS that added me as friends, more than 10 perhaps, just to know who the lucky guy was. :D

and yes, i know she's so popular and that's why i'm so grateful that she chose me.

i don't know why, but actually i always think that i'm not worth that much.

......

and hey, about my univ, i have my first day today.

and it's only 2 hours class and we're all done. *big grin*

but hell yeah, tomorrow is hell.

8 hours non-stop in the studio to draw!

just what the hell are we going to draw?!

this is just insane!

and i must arrive there at 6.30 without being late, even a minute!

just thinking that makes head hurt. :S

by the way this is my "toy" in architecture for these 4 years or more.

it is just so damn expensive!

i must take a really good care of it. :D

i'm off..

Labels: about her, university

7:08 PM

Thursday, August 12, 2010

hey! i was going to write today's story about how sad i was until she text me.

my mood was then pumped up, and so that's it. lol..

nah, kidding you.

umm. remember about me telling you about how fun the univ would be?

well, it's a no no.

no fun at all.

not my senior.. it's the ospek thingy!

i was told that the ospek would be so much fun but in reality, it was like, urghh!

it's no one's fault actually, i just got the wrong teammates.

the ospek itself could be fun, but my teammates and i just couldn't make it as it should be.

then well..

it's just like another formal event, after all.

ah well. i don't really care.

and by the way, hey!

what's wrong with you?

you seem troubled, yet you couldn't tell me.

you know, it breaks my heart.. to see you in trouble, but can't help at all.

i really wish i could read your mind.

this way, i don't need to worry anymore.

but i guess you don't want your mind to be read. lol.

i love you. please be good, okay?

God bless us all.

see you on Christmas.

Labels: about her, university

9:23 PM

Wednesday, August 11, 2010

at last, there is an internet access for my notebook.

at last, I can blog again!

yeay!

well, actually it's possible to blog from my mobile phone, but why bother?

blogging from notebook is far more simple. :D

and hey guys, good news and bad news, choose..

bad news?

I'm going to start my univ tomorrow and yes, it sucks.

*thinking*

maybe i'll say that if i haven't met my seniors couples of days before.

but i'm so glad that i met them and we're all having fun together.

now entering the univ seems fun!

haha..

yahh, no bad news actually. :P

the good news?

the good news is that i don't have any bad news and yes, i know what i'm saying sucks.

*big smile*

it's been so long since I'm so excited in writing blog so please excuse me. :D

so why am i so excited?

here is the other good news.

*whisper*

got that?

hehe..

well actually i'm waiting for christmas so excitedly because i promised someone that i'm going to go back to medan and be her santa. :D

and i really can't wait to see her and give her my best hug (haha) because i really really miss her.

and you know, she is the sweetest person i've ever met!

and i'm really happy that i'm hers now.

*smile*

she gives me anything more than i ever expect and that is just so damn great.

guess i can't stop thanking you.

thanks.. :))

Labels: about her, Christmas, new life

1:03 PM

Tuesday, July 27, 2010

here I am.
to write another part of my life, just as usual.
but today i don't bring good news.
it's been a while since i had my last good things.
i know no one likes bad news.
i know no one cares if i got bad news.
sigh.
yeah, this blog is just for me, myself.
so don't even bother. (no one will, yeah)

this whacking stuff i've just had give me too much pain for sure.
guess what, we broke up.
and hell yeah, it's miserable!
it's not like i can say '*yeay* we broke up!' or 'she dumped me at last' or some of other fucking stuffs.

i really miss her and i mean it.
i miss those smiles, i miss that laughter, i miss how we shared things, everything!
total misery..

but what to do, she doesn't love me anymore.
and that's all my fault!
the consequence of the things i've done to her is this!
don't you think you're fantastic garry? you made things and you can only regret now!

just 1 week to go before you leave for Bandung, and you've left bad memories here.
how great you are, garry, don't you think?
shit!

31st of July it is. i'm leaving.

leaving on a jet plane

Labels: about her, about me, bad day, event, Song, video

12:16 AM

Monday, June 28, 2010

today's really awesome!
first, I've found something to write. (at last)
second, the thing I'm gonna write happened.

isn't that great? :P

I was expecting today as another usual day, sleeping on the bed for hours, playing video games for hours, having lunch and dinner, and feeling bored for the rest of the day.
however, that's not what happened..

I spent my day at my girlfriend's home.. :D
seems simple, but the fun is triple.
lol.

we did stuffs: chit chatting, telling jokes, watching movies, listening to music, playing some games etc..
but that's not what is important.
what is important is that we spent our time together.
we sure had some much fun together.
so comfortable to be around her..
4 hours are more than enough. :D

besides, I got something really special from her.
something I dreamed the other day happened just now!
haha.
thanks darling. :)
I love you. <3

Labels: about her, laura

10:07 PM

Monday, February 1, 2010

ahh..
it's been weeks.
hello readers, hello world.
I finally have a chance to write again.

FYI, I've been playing ikariam again. :D
however, I now play it on Indonesian server.
here is the link..
IKARIAM

by the way, I'd just had the entrance test from "Universitas Katolik Parahyangan", so-called "UNPAR".
it's pretty hard!
I doubt whether or not will I be accepted to study there. :(
but I can just pray, hoping that God would help me. :)
and He sure will. :D
I'm waiting for the announcement which will be told on 6th February.
can't wait.

I am both scared and excited. wew.
since I'll study at Bandung if I am accepted, which means.. I'll stay on her hometown. :)
She'll be back, and then I can be with her. lol.. :D
what a dream.
I think that's all I can share for the first day of February.

just need to pray and have faith in Jesus!
ciao..

P. S. Valentine's day is coming, isn't it?

Labels: about her, game

5:15 PM

Thursday, December 24, 2009

hi everybody.
and hi garry in the future who might be reading this.
how's your life gone?
my life is going fine, if you wish to know.

i start to write this just when the christmas eve is beyond the edge.
*11.57 PM, 23rd December 2009*
3 minutes to go and we'll all have the day before Jesus Christ's birthday.
everyone whose birthday is on 24th December, I wish you happy birthday and good luck.
have your day, friends.

whose birthday is on 25th December, be grateful because of your same birthday with Jesus Christ.
perhaps you'll get more blessing than us who don't have the same birthday with Him.
Amen.

so, where are you all going this christmas eve?
do you all have plan?
may it run well, then.
wish you all luck and blessing this christmas.
this christmas should be a great day for all of us, especially Christians.
Jesus was born?
that's totally a big deal which we should always remember.

well, it's different with my situation here.
i have no plan for both christmas eve and christmas day.
who will i spend my christmas eve with?
who will i spend my christmas day with?

mother's day was passed horribly, passed without my mom by my side.
i'll have a blue christmas eve and christmas day, without any accompany.

but i should say that i'm lucky, i still have one.
Jesus Christ will accompany me.
that's what is important.
i'll never be alone forever.
thank God, thank Jesus.
I love You very much.
I can wait no longer.

may this christmas be Your attendance for the second time, in my life.
I miss You.
I'm feeling so lonely now.
Please come to me Jesus.
:)

well, actually I want to state my today's story here..I mean, today's problem.
but I guess Jesus has swept away all my problems and worries, since I have no will to talk about the problem anymore.
thanks, Jesus.

well, as my dominant motivation is romance motivation, now I'd like to tell about my lovelife.
Umm.

(the story below is only dedicated to garry in the future. you may read it, but i'm sure you won't understand it. only garry in the future and I, and God who know what it means. I write this down just so that I can always remember about how my day passes, not purposely share it to others. so I beg your apologize.)

new story and new hope, new life with new joy, new day about new personality.
It's a story about "tiger and panda".
2 animals with personality, different from fact.
tiger is supposed to be fierce, cruel, and cold-blooded.
panda is supposed to be calm, social, yet fierce in its defense.

now, think of the opposites.
and you'll know where it will take you to.
do you feel butterflies in your stomach?
you must be feeling it, I bet.
because, 1 and half year of waiting worth a thousand unimportant days of being curious.

after all, the 9th letter is the panda, and the tiger is the one to word-with-3-meaning.

I hope the day when garry in the future will be reading this is the day when the tiger has become the panda('s).

I really don't want you to be confused.
just get used to it, because some posts of mine might only be reminders for me in the future, not to be read and understood.

garry, I hope you remember..

Labels: about her, Christmas

12:25 AM

Friday, December 4, 2009

I just posted a note to facebook, on which after I take a look or two, I love very much. hehe..

here is the link..

Love is weird

Labels: about her

8:34 PM

Thursday, December 3, 2009

I guess she doesn't like me waiting for her.
then, fine.
I give her up.
that's enough..

Labels: about her

2:04 PM

Tuesday, December 1, 2009

Argh!! what a distressing life!
urgh..

the semester exam has started.
there is no time to play and have fun anymore.

Blahh!
I hate that statement.
I have to admit it though.

ougghh, great.
we have math on our first day of exam.
however, I did it well.
so far so good.

second day of exam, religion and bahasa Indonesia.
now that I'm irritated.
is it appropriate to give an exam of 12 chapters for ONE lesson?
INSANE, if you are thinking of a word.
well, religion is important, I tell you.
but, 12 chapters?!
what a waste!
we don't even use those matters on our daily life..!
I'm not trying to mock religion, okay?
but the book, it states too much information that isn't actually crucial.
WHICH.. we call as "BeCe"!
you'll know when you see.

well, actually it's time to study now.
yeah, for jerks!
who can stand reading that kind of book for hours.. or minutes maybe?
I tell you, no one can!
no exception.

*sigh*
enough of it.
let's talk about my life again..

let's see..
what to tell today, pal?
oww yes.
by the way, I've just felt that she's changing, becomes strange.
I wonder what's going on.
I will help her if I can.
however, she never tells me her problems.
do women always hide their sorrow?
why don't they just tell?
I'm happy to help, but if she keeps on not telling me, how can I help?

argh!
women are hard to be understood.
people are hard to be understood.
and I, as the greatest enemy for myself, am hard to understand and to be understood.
God!

oh yeah, I told Cindy Tantarica about my missing one of our friends, Vivi Rihanty.
it has been so long since my last contact with her.
I'm wondering what she is doing now.
she has turned even more arrogant than before. that's disappointing me.
but I should admit it that I miss her so much.
how is her life?
has she grown up?
has she become mature?
has she understood everything about this life?
has she learned to be a real adult?
I hope she's strong now, so that she won't cry that easily like she did before.

not because you've grown up that you may not cry.
it's just, don't let your tears fall down that easy..
calm and strong, that's what you need.
men are jerks, as we all know.
they don't deserve your tears. remember that!
family, friends, they are the important ones.

watch your feet, for you may not know when there is a hole waiting for you to step into.
be strong, since God won't wipe your problems out.
Instead, He will give you a strong shoulder so that you are able to carry every single of them.

I hope she will read this, although I know that it's impossible to happen.
*sigh*
bye friends.
got to work for my exam.

Labels: about her, friends, people, school

8:42 PM

Wednesday, April 8, 2009

So..
She will be leaving this pathetic town next year.
This is.. shocking.
I'd never felt her beside me but then, she decided to leave..
I guess this feeling will never be satisfied..
*sigh*

So..
This is me.
I am left alone in this town, forced to sew my own thread of life.
I guess this phone tag game will definitely end, as soon as she goes.
Wow.
Although I don't want this to happen, I wish your very best luck there.
. . . . .

Labels: about her

8:08 PM

Thursday, March 5, 2009

It's been a long time since my last post.
I'm kinda miss posting..
And weird.
Yeah, I'm not used to do this anymore.
Argh..
Never mind that.

By the way, you sure recognize that my blog has turned into some kind of, you know, music box.
When it's full of songs and you're confused which one you're gonna play first.
I'm crazy about music now!
Well, it's fun, it's cool.
And besides, it's suit with what I'm feeling right now.
It's kinda pathetic, huh?
Yea..
I know I'm pathetic.
This world would have just swallowed me alive and I think I would be fine with it.
Ckck..

You know, I'm talking things about her.
We're now no longer... you could guess.
We're still friends, yea, friends.
But not as close as we used to be.
I wish I've never done that stuff..!
It's killing me softly.
She seems avoiding me, I don't know why, I just feel like she is.
Do I really need to learn how to hate you?
Please give me an answer to it.
I'm sick of being this way!
This is my unspoken feeling...

Goodbye - Secondhand Serenade

It's a shame that it had to be this way
It's not enough to say I'm sorry
It's not enough to say I'm sorry

Maybe I'm to blame
Or maybe we're the same
But either way I can't breathe
Either way I can't breathe

All I had to say is goodbye
We're better off this way
We're better off this way

I'm alive but I'm losing all my drive
Cause everything we've been through
And everything about you
Seemed to be a lie
A guiltless twisted lie
It made me learn to hate you
Or hate myself for letting it pass by

All I had to say is goodbye
We're better off this way
We're better off this way
All I had to say is goodbye
We're better off this way
We're better off this way

And every, everything isn't only
What it seemed so hold these
Words that you never told me
It's time to say goodbye
It's time to say goodbye
It's time to say goodbye
Goodbye

Bye

Take my hand away
Spell it out
Tell me I was wrong
Tell me I was wrong

Take my hand away
Spell it out
Tell me I was wrong
Tell me I was wrong

Take my hand away
Spell it out
Tell me I was wrong
Tell me I was wrong

Labels: about her

10:34 PM

Wednesday, February 25, 2009

I know you don't really care about what I'm saying.
Every single new message I send will be just another "press and delete" work to you.
Act speaks louder than word, I know.
And I realize that I talk much more than act.
But that's because of your not giving me any chance to act.
So, please give me that chance and I'll show you that I officially love you.

xxx..

Labels: about her

11:39 PM

Monday, February 16, 2009

Luck didn't take place at all, huh?
Yeah..
I heard so many 'good luck' phrases, here and there.
None of them worked, I think.
And my efforts didn't reach either a single piece of her heart.
How shameful I am!
You can't even cry when you want!
You're that weak, aren't you?
*sob*

I don't know how to describe my feeling now.
I feel so sad, yet relieve with what I've got from her.
I just can't breathe normally right now.
Are we better off this way?
Do friends really enough?
I'm alive.. yeah.. I'm sure I'm alive.
But I think I've lost the sense of living.
Need I learn to hate you?

I...
I don't know what to do now.

"Love is Largely an Art of Persistence."
Here is my favorite quote.
The quote which always strengthens me.
Yeah..
I think I won't give up that easy.
But..
Can I hold up with that?
*sigh*

I'm really pleased to meet her.
Thanks God for uniting me with her.
I won't regret..

Labels: about her

9:24 PM

Monday, January 5, 2009

I think she's not going home just yet.
wew.

I glimpsed her friendster profile and noticed some updates there.
Hoah..
During her holiday, she was at her momma's hometown.
And there's no internet line in their house.
So she's not on line during the holiday.
However, I saw changes, so I thought she's gone home.

I was surprised, else happy.
I miss her that much.
So, I immediately text her, asked whether she's gone home or not.
But then I found out that she's still there.
Who updated her profile then?

I thought she's lying, so I asked her friend to confirm.
She said the same.
I knew it at last that she updated it at internet cafe.
I think she's really not going home yet, huh?

I truly really miss her.

Labels: about her

6:38 PM

Monday, December 15, 2008

P.S.
Ow yeah..
One last thing I forget to say.
I will give her the 13th rose as she says 'yes'.
lol..

Labels: about her

12:53 AM

Sunday, December 14, 2008

It is so so so not fair!
The plan I've arranged properly must be canceled just because of 1 silly thing i forgot about.
How..how..HOW??

She(you know who) had told me about her spending her Christmas and New Year's holiday to her hometown in Pekan Baru.
She had really told me about that.
And how could i forget about it?
It's not damn fair.

I was planning to come to her house at Christmas Eve.
For what?
Here it is.. or it was. :(

"Christmas Eve is a special day for me.
And I will be at her house that day if she's not staying at Pekan Baru.
She's going to be home at January.
It's so terrible!
I'd planned to tell her my feeling.
The 3rd time.

She likes number 13.
And I was going to bring her 12 red roses with 'Merry Christmas', and with poem or love letter.
Why 12?
'Cause I was going to say, "I bring you this 12 roses and just 12 roses cause you are and will always be my 13th rose, dear."
lol.
Isn't that great? :DD
That would be great if she's not gone. :(
That's when I will tell her my feeling."

And it's canceled!
Huaaa!!

Labels: about her

11:18 PM

Saturday, October 16, 2010

please vote for them, my friends. just 'like' the photo, but before that, add the account 'Rapid Medan' first. thank you. :D

http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=1662863056087&set=a.1657085951663.90497.1372551834

Labels: about her

2:47 PM

Sunday, September 26, 2010

I exclusively wish Stephanie Candra a very happy birthday!
may all good wishes come true and existing things grow better and better.

HAPPY 16TH BIRTHDAY MY DEAR. <3
I love you.

Labels: about her, event

9:14 AM

Tuesday, August 24, 2010

hello mr. worry-head, do you know that you have over-worried about something too much?

yes, i'm talking to myself.

and yes, i do worry too much.

you see, she and i haven't had a proper contact recently because both of us have been so busy.

i got tons of works to be done from college, and she's having her school exam.

and yes i tell you, i DO worry.

unreasonable worries actually, because just like i told you, i got tons of works to be done from college, and she's having her school exam.

do i say it right?

i got tons of works to be done from college, and she's having her school exam.

and hell yeah!

I've known the reason why we haven't had a proper contact, it's so obvious, isn't it?

but i just can't stop worrying, i don't know why.

maybe it's just because i feel so lonely. :(

i always stop worrying just when i got her message. it's like i'm relieved just by having news from her.

now that i miss you more and more. :(

guess i'm off.

see you on Christmas.

Labels: about her

10:38 PM

Wednesday, August 18, 2010

hey!

think that i blogged much recently. :D

since when, eh?

ahh. since i started falling for her i guess. *grin*

she's just so perfect that i can't stop admiring her. *big smile*

but eh, i got some story to tell you.

*curhat*

lol.

you know, since i published my relationship with her on facebook, it has been so many GUYS that added me as friends, more than 10 perhaps, just to know who the lucky guy was. :D

and yes, i know she's so popular and that's why i'm so grateful that she chose me.

i don't know why, but actually i always think that i'm not worth that much.

......

and hey, about my univ, i have my first day today.

and it's only 2 hours class and we're all done. *big grin*

but hell yeah, tomorrow is hell.

8 hours non-stop in the studio to draw!

just what the hell are we going to draw?!

this is just insane!

and i must arrive there at 6.30 without being late, even a minute!

just thinking that makes head hurt. :S

by the way this is my "toy" in architecture for these 4 years or more.

it is just so damn expensive!

i must take a really good care of it. :D

i'm off..

Labels: about her, university

7:08 PM

Thursday, August 12, 2010

hey! i was going to write today's story about how sad i was until she text me.

my mood was then pumped up, and so that's it. lol..

nah, kidding you.

umm. remember about me telling you about how fun the univ would be?

well, it's a no no.

no fun at all.

not my senior.. it's the ospek thingy!

i was told that the ospek would be so much fun but in reality, it was like, urghh!

it's no one's fault actually, i just got the wrong teammates.

the ospek itself could be fun, but my teammates and i just couldn't make it as it should be.

then well..

it's just like another formal event, after all.

ah well. i don't really care.

and by the way, hey!

what's wrong with you?

you seem troubled, yet you couldn't tell me.

you know, it breaks my heart.. to see you in trouble, but can't help at all.

i really wish i could read your mind.

this way, i don't need to worry anymore.

but i guess you don't want your mind to be read. lol.

i love you. please be good, okay?

God bless us all.

see you on Christmas.

Labels: about her, university

9:23 PM

Wednesday, August 11, 2010

at last, there is an internet access for my notebook.

at last, I can blog again!

yeay!

well, actually it's possible to blog from my mobile phone, but why bother?

blogging from notebook is far more simple. :D

and hey guys, good news and bad news, choose..

bad news?

I'm going to start my univ tomorrow and yes, it sucks.

*thinking*

maybe i'll say that if i haven't met my seniors couples of days before.

but i'm so glad that i met them and we're all having fun together.

now entering the univ seems fun!

haha..

yahh, no bad news actually. :P

the good news?

the good news is that i don't have any bad news and yes, i know what i'm saying sucks.

*big smile*

it's been so long since I'm so excited in writing blog so please excuse me. :D

so why am i so excited?

here is the other good news.

*whisper*

got that?

hehe..

well actually i'm waiting for christmas so excitedly because i promised someone that i'm going to go back to medan and be her santa. :D

and i really can't wait to see her and give her my best hug (haha) because i really really miss her.

and you know, she is the sweetest person i've ever met!

and i'm really happy that i'm hers now.

*smile*

she gives me anything more than i ever expect and that is just so damn great.

guess i can't stop thanking you.

thanks.. :))

Labels: about her, Christmas, new life

1:03 PM

Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Labels: about her, about me, bad day, event, Song, video

12:16 AM

Monday, June 28, 2010

Labels: about her, laura

10:07 PM

Monday, February 1, 2010

Labels: about her, game

5:15 PM

Thursday, December 24, 2009

Labels: about her, Christmas

12:25 AM

Friday, December 4, 2009

I just posted a note to facebook, on which after I take a look or two, I love very much. hehe..

here is the link..

Love is weird

Labels: about her

8:34 PM

Thursday, December 3, 2009

I guess she doesn't like me waiting for her.
then, fine.
I give her up.
that's enough..

Labels: about her

2:04 PM

Tuesday, December 1, 2009

Labels: about her, friends, people, school

8:42 PM

Wednesday, April 8, 2009

Labels: about her

8:08 PM

Thursday, March 5, 2009

Labels: about her

10:34 PM

Wednesday, February 25, 2009

Labels: about her

11:39 PM

Monday, February 16, 2009

Labels: about her

9:24 PM

Monday, January 5, 2009

Labels: about her

6:38 PM

Monday, December 15, 2008

P.S.
Ow yeah..
One last thing I forget to say.
I will give her the 13th rose as she says 'yes'.
lol..

Labels: about her

12:53 AM

Sunday, December 14, 2008

Labels: about her

11:18 PM